12·01·01 Dawn

01-DEC-2001 05:00
And so I wait, for that glorious day
When the one I dream of comes my way
And when our lips touch, so tenderly
I know I'll feel something inside of me
      I want to feel passion, I want to feel pain
      I want to weep at the sound of your name
      Come make me laugh, or come make me cry
      Just make me feel alive
« Joey Lauren Adams, "Alive" »

I've been busy. I woke up at eight am Friday, went to Inter. Mech. II to pick up the take-home exam. It's one question: You have a cylinder, rotating. People can stand on the interior, and it simulates Earth's gravity with "centrifugal force". My assignment is to describe life inside this habitat. If I was unclear, think of Freeside in the Sprawl series by William Gibson. [The Sprawl series consists mainly of Neuromancer, Count Zero, and Mona Lisa Overdrive. It also includes some short stories, like my favorite, Burning Chrome.] But yeah. I'm going to write a narrative. A day in the life of a Freesider, so to speak. It ought to be interesting.

After that class, I went straight to the Campus Center for "Imagining The Future" which was some beamed-in talk by Arthur C. Clarke from Sri Lanka, followed by a panel discussion. I went not for the Arthur C. Clarke, but for the panel, which started just as I got there. And I went because Raymond Kurzweil was a panelist. And he wrote an interesting book, entitled The Age Of Spiritual Machines, which I read because of the damned good CD Spiritual Machines by Our Lady Peace, which Kurzweil does voiceovers on. Anyway. The talkwas interesting. Kind of inspiring. But the segments with the children/young relatives of WPI faculty were fucking annoying. Especially some guy named Heinricher's kid. What. A. Dumbass. But other than that, it left me kind of optimistic about the future. An interesting point was when someone just jumped up randomly and shouted the question: "In the future, do you think policy will still be decided by rich white people?" [That may not be quite the exact wording, but it was words to that effect.] That was kind of funny, actually. But anyway. After that, I got a poster for the discussion signed, and I had Kurzweil sign my copy of The Age Of Spiritual Machines, as well as the case to my copy of Spiritual Machines [the CD].

After that, I stayed to help strike with Lindsay and Josh. Then we moved some shit over to Riley, and then went to bench the movie, Chasing Amy. The panel ended at 11:30; I got done with the signature-getting at noon, and it took until a little after one to strike the panel's stage. So yeah, I've never benched a movie, so Lindsay wanted me to do it. After bumbling, I just gave up and passed it to her. But yeah. Benching was finally completed around four. Then I went with Lindsay to go relace her boots. We stopped at my place for around ten minutes so I could drop my bookbag and stuff. [I'd ended up only going to one of my three classes that day. And that one class was Inter. Mech. II that morning.] Then we went to go eat dinner, and by then it was time to go work the movie. Chasing Amy was good, as usual. Stuck around a while afterwards, then left, went to my place, watched The Nightmare Before Christmas, but then Lindsay got sleepy, so I walked her back to Morgan.

Instead of going back to my place for almost certain boredom, I stopped in at E8, where I'd heard where was anime watching and binge drinking. There was Guiness, but I'm not a beer guy. But I hung out, talked, etc. It was good. Most notable talk for me was the talk about girls. I received much encouragement to go talk to mystery girl, except I haven't seen her at all lately, which really bothers me. I worry I freaked her out too much. But yeah. And Jeff and I compared experiences. Sort of. I'm being intentionally vague. Oh, whatever. Skipping on. More talking, more talking. There was a run to go get cigarettes.

Anyway, I ended up next door in E7 with Jeff, Ben, and Frank. After Ben left we started talking more about what we want in a girl. Jeff and I were looking for some kind of emotional connection. Frank's looking for sex. I really thought I emphasized this too much and made it sound like I was rubbing it in, but I wasn't trying to be arrogant. Sex isn't all it's cracked to be, in my experience. It was a letdown. And I think I would have been better off not having sex. But yeah, I'm a dumbass, and hopefully I've learned. And I joke about it a lot, but I'm not a sex fiend. Or, given the opportunity, I don't think I'd be a sex fiend. But yeah. Frank said he wanted something "tangible". I think he also said something like "well, what else is there to do; it's the logical step". Well, another logical step is a breakup, too, doesn't mean you want to rush toward that. Frank actually said something worthwhile. He said he wanted a good female friend, with whom he could hang out and be close to and do stuff with... like have sex. And he had me agreeing up until that last point.

Anyway, now I'm sitting here typing this in between bouts with MySQL. And I haven't slept. And I feel like a smoke. But I'm trying to help with the GDC site. I kind of feel a little overstressed. And I have to be in Alden at noon to help setup for with the International Society's dinner tonight. But I'm actually not tired. I feel good. Alive. Busy. I feel like I have a purpose. I'm actually... content.

12·01·01 Early Afternoon

01-DEC-2001 13:00
Everbody and everything I've known
Never taught me how to stand up on my own
Had to learn it from the one who let me go
Now I walk alone, yeah, I walk alone...
« Oleander, "I Walk Alone" »

I hate it when people don't get that something they keep bringing up bothers you. Then again, there is the possibility that they know it bothers you, and bring it up anyway. That sucks, too.

12·01·01 Late Night

01-DEC-2001 22:00
Just for once I'd like to be someone's number one guy.
« p2, Girls Suck »