12·06·01 Very Early Morning

06-DEC-2001 00:00
I'm upset
Happiness is not a fish
That you can catch
Imagination can't resist
The laziness
That pins you down
Get on your knees...
« Our Lady Peace, "Happiness & The Fish" »

I slept most of the day, in various places. I got back from the website thing with Liam around eleven, then went for a quick drive with Chad down Route 9. After that, Lindsay came over. Went grocery shopping, then I fell asleep on the couch. Then, LnL meeting and movie at Psyci's. Enemy Of The State. Still a decent movie. "Subject is down... down, permanently..." Heh.

Dispersal was timed this time. From the beginning of the credits. Almost complete dispersal [down to the people who lived there, Lindsay and myself] occurred within one minute and 42 seconds. And about thirty seconds later, it was just Lindsay, Psyci, and myself. Yep. So we hung for a bit. Then I made some comment, and Lindsay left. So Psyci and I talked for about an hour or so. And then I came back home.

I'm not in the best shape mentally right now... sometimes I feel so out of it. And unwanted... Very unwanted. And insecure. That's more like all the time, though.

... And I'm really sick of wanting things that I have absolutely no chance of getting. And no matter what you may be thinking, that isn't everything that I'm talking about.

And it was evening
I saw my breath
And I was needing to hear your tenderness
I was blinded by the sight, the power of the changing tide of
Your nature
Stay singing softly
You take me home
Like a slow boat on the water
Like an old stone...
« Hothouse Flowers, "Your Nature" »